“Always make decisions that prioritize your inner peace.” — Izey Victoria Odiase

Thanksgiving. The smells, the laughter, the love… and sometimes, the emotional rollercoaster of being around family or friends who are, let’s be honest, a little exhausting. You love them, you really do, but somewhere between Aunt Tia’s unsolicited advice and Uncle Will’s political rants, you feel yourself shrinking, fading, and wondering: How do I show up fully, love them, and still stay true to me?

If you’re anything like me, you want to be present, kind, and generous, but you also don’t want to leave the table feeling depleted. Here’s how to do Thanksgiving your way, without losing yourself.

1. Check in with yourself first

Before you walk in that door, take a few minutes to get grounded. Sit quietly, breathe, and ask: What do I need to feel good, calm, and connected? How will I choose to show up today?

Even a short pause helps you notice your energy and reminds you that your needs matter.

2. Accept differences (and let them be)

Some family members are… well, a little spicy. And that’s okay. Their opinions, habits, or quirks aren’t a reflection of your worth or your values. You don’t need to change them, correct them, or “fix” them. You just need to show up fully as yourself.

Quick exercise: When someone triggers you, pause and ask: Is this about them, or about my expectation that they think and act differently?

3. Know your boundaries

Boundaries are your secret weapon for surviving (and thriving) at family gatherings. Decide ahead of time what you will and won’t tolerate — whether that’s staying off certain topics, limiting alcohol, or stepping away for a quiet moment.

Try this: Identify one boundary before the big day. For example: I will excuse myself for 5 minutes if I feel drained, and that’s okay.

4. Communicate your needs (gently but firmly)

You don’t need to be silent to keep the peace. Saying something simple like, “I need a moment to step outside and reset” or “Let’s pause on that topic for now” is powerful. Honesty doesn’t have to be confrontational — it’s a way to protect your energy while staying connected.

5. Stay rooted in your individuality

Remember the things that make you you — your routines, your humor, your perspective. You can share and celebrate with others without losing your center. Even small rituals — like your morning meditation, a favorite playlist, or a 10-minute walk — help you stay grounded.

6. Practice spacious love

Loving others doesn’t mean absorbing everything they feel, think, or say. It’s about holding space for them while holding space for yourself. You can care deeply without overextending your energy.

Heart-centered reminder: You get to choose how much of your energy you give and preserve — and that choice doesn’t make you selfish.

7. Reflect and reset

At the end of the day, take stock: When did I feel full, calm, and myself? When did I feel drained or reactive? Reflection isn’t judgment — it’s your tool for growth and awareness.

This Thanksgiving, fall in love with the art of loving others and loving yourself. Set boundaries, stay present, communicate gently, and honor your energy. When you do, you’ll notice something magical: your relationships deepen, your joy expands, and your sense of self shines brighter than ever.

Mini-challenge: Pick one act this Thanksgiving that prioritizes you — a quiet cup of tea, a walk outside, or a gentle “no” when needed. Watch how it changes your experience of the day.

Written by: Grace Alexis

Timestamp: 8:00 am EST